Some Life Somewhere
It was my lifeline to hope. Could I recover? Could I survive? She did. If she could, so could I. It helped me to think in the future… that life might restore to some semblance of happiness. I began writing in my journal. It was a private place to cry my tears, scream out in anger, and ask the questions that made no sense at all.
It upsets the natural order of things. It rips away the future you thought you had. Grieving is hard work. Within the pages of my journal, I began to see what actually happens… the time the sorrow lasts gets shorter and the time when life is pretty okay grows longer. Somewhere in the delta is the acceptance of a world without my child. They were illustrated fairy tales that did quite well in the book world. Barnes and Noble featured one of them and they received a lot of media attention, selling to schools and libraries around the country.
“All people end up somewhere in life, but few end up there on purpose.”
My publisher had just set up a publicity tour for the second book and I was scheduled to hit the talk show circuit. Life was much too real.
People often asked me when my next book was coming out. I secretly felt the calling to write my personal story, but emotionally I was terrified. Then one day, the pain of not doing it was far greater than the pain of doing it. As I continued to heal from my loss, I found myself finding the courage to think about beginning the project.
Writing is a commitment that is sometimes a struggle in itself. It took a strategy to get my commitment in motion.
Journal writing reveals parts of your story you didn’t see before.
Wattles says, if all you do is dream, you have no strategy. Behind the dream there has to be a clear vision to bring it to fruition. My purpose came alive in knowing there are other parents out there who will experience such tragic loss. I wanted my book to be in the purse of that mother, and to bring her hope in some small way. Productivity happens when you make a plan and turn that plan into a habit by creating a ritual for your writing to begin. I committed to writing every day from PM to PM. My ritual begins with making a perfect cappuccino.
Sometimes I pick roses from my garden and put them in a vase at my desk. Then, I sit down, light a candle, turn on soft music, and close my eyes for a few minutes of quiet reflection. Even with the perfect ritual, the first few sessions were grueling.
It was so hard to revisit my sorrow. But I persevered. I kept thinking of the author, Harriet Sarnoff Schiff, and how, within the pages of her book, she offered me specific ways for me to heal. Writers are powerful people. Writers… commit to your work. Do you have any idea how much the world needs your perspective? Your story is something that someone needs to read. Writing it will change you and change others.
Planning package: MAKE YOUR PASSION A REALITY
Restore your faith in yourself by doing what you say you always wanted to do. Victor Frankel , Holocaust survivor, philosopher, and author, says suffering changes when it finds meaning. A project. A redemptive view of suffering, helping others, the healing power you have in being able to offer others the insight to your life and how you healed. A significant relationship. In writing my book, I was fulfilling the first two. The third was also in process because I learned a lot about the relationship I have with myself. I found more confidence in my ability to complete what I said I would do.
You will no longer be hostage to the things that held you back from becoming your highest self. I learned to respect the woman I was and the woman I was becoming. I had, in fact, survived the greatest loss a parent could imagine.
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I am a good mother. I am stronger than ever, and I could write about it.
metaphors - "Getting somewhere with one's life" meaning - English Language & Usage Stack Exchange
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